best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You can't just leave with hair like that
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
