i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize
