I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
