I must be too annoying 4 u.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
