You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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