you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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