eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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