Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.