just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
