I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize