my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
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