How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
