so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
