wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
