Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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