Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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