Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
