4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
