how do flat chested girls get laid?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
