One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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