I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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