My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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