i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize