I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I use my feet as sexual weapons
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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