I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
