I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
