I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
