we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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