he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize