he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
