just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Randomize