Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.