Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!

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(615): Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY! http://tfl.nu/jz8m

Replies (21) Good night (998) Bad night (4269)
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(972): View more from Texas

You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"

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(972): You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry" http://tfl.nu/fk1l

Replies (21) Good night (11752) Bad night (1070)
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(805): View more from California

we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home

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(805): we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home http://tfl.nu/wods

Replies (17) Good night (1143) Bad night (8005)
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(702): View more from Nevada

I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.

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(702): I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave. http://tfl.nu/8hoe

Replies (17) Good night (3778) Bad night (1585)
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(317): View more from Indiana

She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here

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(317): She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here http://tfl.nu/ql7u

Replies (2) Good night (2346) Bad night (886)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.

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(612): She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me. http://tfl.nu/y2d7

Replies (5) Good night (1425) Bad night (2236)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.

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(617): I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar. http://tfl.nu/rzqi

Replies (4) Good night (2311) Bad night (863)
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(847): View more from Illinois

You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day

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(847): You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day http://tfl.nu/8r8f

Replies (8) Good night (2259) Bad night (872)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.

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(860): Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta. http://tfl.nu/gtno

Replies (12) Good night (681) Bad night (2545)
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(774): View more from Massachusetts

I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed

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(774): I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed http://tfl.nu/b36x

Replies (11) Good night (2952) Bad night (784)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material

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(+44): I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material http://tfl.nu/6zdu

Replies (6) Good night (1513) Bad night (359)
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(208): View more from Idaho

I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.

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(208): I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook. http://tfl.nu/vmgg

Replies (1) Good night (363) Bad night (583)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet

(770): View more from Georgia

What is my life?

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(901): The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet (770): What is my life? http://tfl.nu/abv3

Replies (3) Good night (444) Bad night (528)
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(850): View more from Florida

she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...

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(850): she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top... http://tfl.nu/vvwb

Replies (3) Good night (321) Bad night (765)
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(443): View more from Maryland

So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina

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(443): So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina http://tfl.nu/qg34

Replies (9) Good night (212) Bad night (838)

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