you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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