There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
