my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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