I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
We have so much sex to catch up on
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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