You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Can you bring me the toilet please
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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