Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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