somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee