I have demons in me.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
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