we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
