I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
