do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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