I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
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Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
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She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.