I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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