shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
