We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Damn victory sex feels great
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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