when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
