i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
