so explain again why im purple
no
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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