you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
