come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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