So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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