**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
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